A struggle

I am doing my best to turn my focus on to my own self. How I behave and how I react to others behavior, and I'm not doing all that bad. It's just this one tiny area I'm having a really hard time with.

TJ has accepted responsibility for something...signing the kids up for a program at the park, and I am doing my very best to back off, not to get in his way, or nag. I am trying very hard to either cheer his success or... well...that's where I'm stuck.

Should he not succeed. Should he do the usual thing he does, and completely forget. What do I do then? I have every intention of doing nothing to rectify the situation. This ball is in his hands and should he drop it...it will either be him that picks it up or it will simply roll away on the ground. I will not swoop in and fix it; it will stay broken. And it sucks for the kids because there is a chance they won't get signed up for this particular program. (Though, I'm pretty sure they have long forgotten about it) But how do I react?

Well, I know how I will react..I will get angry, disappointed, feel let down, annoyed, frustrated...etc. The question really is what will I do? Will I yell? Will I point out that once again he has not done something he promised me he would take care of? Will I cry? Will I pout? Will I scream and bang my fists on the table? Or will I simply let it go and hope he takes the next opportunity to step up and be the responsible man I know he can be?

To be honest I don't know what I will do. I have asked him a few times if he knew when the program started and each time he has said "Oh crap! I need to do that tonight!". I haven't pressured him, I haven't rolled my eyes, I've simply said "Well, let me know. I think it runs on Saturdays and I want to make sure I'm not working that day so I can be there for the first day,"

I'll be honest, again, and say I got frustrated with it and finally looked it up to see when the first day is, I'm not working and if he gets them signed up it will be a great day.

I am hoping that I can simply point out to him that he didn't do it and that I will be respectful and let it go... actually, I'm hoping he does it and proves me wrong for having all this anxiety about it. He said he'll do it. I have to trust that he is going to do it! He will do it!

He'll do it....he'll do it...he'll do it. And if he doesn't...I will be good. I will not scream and yell and have a fit. I will simply let it go...but I will NOT fix it. It just won't get done. Focus on me...focus on my reaction...

Do I sound like a broken self help book?