A little Update

Just as I finished posting the other night about how wonderful everything was going here...I got myself into trouble!

I'll be honest, I don't remember what set me off or even what I said but I said just enough to get TJ upset. Tj has been favoring his belt lately. I, on the other hand, despise the black leather creature and wish I could somehow accidentally destroy the beast.

The spanking wasn't that long but it adequately got us past the issue. The thing about TJ is no matter how stern he is before and during the spanking he is all gooey love afterward. He always hugs and kisses me and asks me to reaffirm that I love him. The lovemaking was also nice. (I'm snickering here, cos it was actually mind blowing passionate sex)

Yesterday was not the best of days for me. I found out that I will most likely be needing surgery on a part of my body most people would rather not have another human being (other then your S/o) look at much less operate on. I was not feeling very good about it at all and instead of telling TJ about how unsexy I felt I just threw the word "whatever" at him whenever he warned me for my tone.

Finally having enough of that he beckoned me to his office. I followed, reluctantly, and tried to tell him that I wasn't in the right frame of mind and that spanking me would get us no where. Boy was I wrong! The spanking did not fix my emotions, however, it got me to tell him what my emotions were. Once I blurted out what was wrong with me he sat back and dropped his belt. He had me curl up on his lap and we talked.

He was totally loving and supportive. He did explain that if I'm feeling something like that it's not an excuse to act out, that I am suppose to tell him so he can help me. He can't fix the physical thing that's wrong but he can help me to emotionally deal with it.

So by being open and vulnerable with him I have allowed him to love me, all of me. Who knew!