Tuesday, May 18, 2010

The Good and The Bad....

The good:

I have received a promotion. The office manager is moving and I have been moved up into her position, or will be when she leaves at the end of this week. I am excited about the new challenge and am absolutely terrified of it. I'm entering a bit of a mess, really. One employee just broke her arm and will be out of work for a month, another is on the brink of being terminated, and I have to hire a part time receptionist this week (who will replace the fired employee once she's been fired). Along with a few other little fires that need to be put out, but I'm planning on taking things one day at a time.

I worry about how this will change things here at home. Can I be "boss" at work and "submissive" at home? How do I transform that quickly as I walk into the house? Will I be able to? Things are shaky at home with the D/s dynamic as it is, will this clinch the deal and kill it all together?

The bad:
I had a horrible spanking the other night. It was completely warranted, I poked the bear and the bear bit hard!

TJ had asked me to write him a letter a week ago about what I was thinking. I did. He didn't read it. One of the things I mentioned in the letter was that sometimes I feel as though he loves the benefits of being the Dom/HOH/whatever but doesn't want to put any effort into it other than getting his way, being served, and serviced by me. So when he didn't read the letter, when he couldn't be bothered to read the 4 paragraphs he asked me to write...i got cheeky. I didn't really do it intentionally, the attitude that is. The directly disobeying him...yeah..I did that on purpose.

How childish! How unsubmissive! I agree.

I mentioned that I wanted to get some icecream from the freezer and he said "No, no more ice cream today," (cos he let me have a small bowl after lunch). I shrugged in response. An hour later, after the kids were in bed, I sat down with my frosty treat to watch a movie.


"How's the ice cream?" he asked in a strained tone. I smiled and said it was great. Poke, Poke, Poke. "When your movie is over I want to speak with you,"

"Uh, huh," poke!

The hairbrush and I did more talking than TJ did, of that I am sure. Although I did hear him say things like, "You don't roll your eyes at me!" (I don't remember doing it, but I'm sure I did) and "I can't believe you ate that ice cream right in front of my face!"

In the end I did tell him I was upset about the letter, and he explained that it was no excuse for my behavior (which I already knew). He has since read the letter and we chatted very briefly about it. It wasn't a big deal really, and I handled the whole thing like a ninny.

3 comments:

Baby Girl said...

Sometimes it is near impossible to not poke the bear...will we never learn??? (Although part of me hopes that the answer to that question is no!)

Take care,
Baby Girl :)

daisy said...

As for the shifting from 'boss' to 'sub', I have no personal experience with it, but Sara (FindingSara) seems to have a good grasp on that. She really seems to manage it quite well, and I'm sure you will too.

As for poking the bear (cute reference by the way) - against our better judgment, well, sometimes we just need to. lol

daisy said...

and congrats on the promotion!